Bittersweet Parenting

My son, if sinful men entice you,

do not give in to them.

If they say, "Come along with us;

Let's lie in wait for innocent blood,

Let's ambush some harmless soul...

My son, do not go along with them,

Do not set foot on their paths...

(Proverbs)

The older our kids get, the more we're noticing that parenting is truly a bittersweet affair. There are moments of genuine beauty and warmth, and there are moments where you get this nervous knot in your stomach as you are forced to discipline your children and hope that they take your words to heart. It honestly feels like the whole world is at stake. If they listen, if their hearts are soft enough to hear the love behind the warning, then they'll change their ways and follow a better path. I'm talking about Robyn here, of course, the rebellious little tyke. (Just joking.). If they don't, and they turn away and choose to find their security, value, comfort somewhere else... I'm not really sure how we'll deal with that.

Listen to me stressing out over these things when the kids are all under five. But Jesse turns five on Thursday, and he's already showing these little hints of much bigger struggles down the road. Honesty or deception? Love or selfishness? I don't believe for a minute that the things we'll face when these kiddies are teens don't have their roots in what's happening right now.

Ultimately, it's out of our control. God is holding us tightly; we really believe this, and we pray for our kids every day. We need to - because I honestly don't know what else I can do to convince Jesse to be genuinely kind to his siblings, or convince Janna not to be a diva, or convince Robyn not to bite all of us.

Parenting tips are always appreciated.

Here's the sweet part: Janna is genuinely in love with her mom and is truly excited about going out on their date to the grocery store tonight.

Bitter: Her innocent, heartfelt comments before she left were, "Hi Dada. I'm going to the store with Momma. Not with you. With Momma. Right, Momma? Just us. Not Dada." Then she glared at me as though I were some sort of nefarious beast that was plotting to swoop in and destroy her Mom time.

Sweet: Yes, my child is, quite literally, embracing the word of God. Take heart, all my merry conservative friends, that this is the ESV, not The Message. Robyn is clearly like "a tree planted by streams of water / which yields its fruit in season."

Bitter: She is angry that she is not going with Janna on the Mom-date. I am the only tangible object of her ire. She has already brought me one of my shoes (pictured in the foreground), and now she is actually pitching the large study Bible at me in an emotional appeal to get going.

(Note: Having launched the good book at my chest, she proceeded to angrily fling open the pages. I thought this was merely a childish act of rage until I noticed that she had flung the Bible open to the book of Exodus. Clearly she thought it was time to get moving.)

Bitter: Jesse is being forced to eat a plate of rice after feeding much of his supper to the dog in an effort to get dessert faster. Even worse, this is after repeated warnings not to give the dog his food. Childish stunt or something bigger? We thought the latter, much to Jesse's dismay.

Sweet: After being informed that he would have no dessert, being asked to eat a new plate of rice, and throwing an impressive tantrum in his room, Jesse came down for a heart-to-heart with dad about deception and honesty. He (eventually) took it like a man, finished his rice, and asked God to help him not to be "crafty" (somehow that word got thrown in). 

Man, we don't really know what we're doing here, but the intentions are good. And while parenting may be bittersweet, the sweet definitely outweighs the bitter, at least right now. God help us!

Sincerely,
Until next time...